While a narcissist hides there true self behind their imaginary false self, therefore
appearing happy and charming to those not living behind the same four walls, a
child….in there pure innocence….does not know how to pretend to be
something they aren’t. And if they are “forced” to do so (my ex would yell at the kids if their faces did not reflect happiness in public) you can still see the signs of their pain.
What to look for if a child has become the scapegoat of a narcissist:
A smile that simply portrays teeth yet depths of sadness are portrayed in the eyes…
A child whose eyes shift constantly back to the narcissistic parent as if needing to constantly know where that parent is and if they are being observed by the parent…
A child that is not affectionate with family members. Ex. grandma visits and the child seems afraid to show any excitement or love, stands like a tree when embraced…
An emotionless child..doesn’t laugh spontaneously, doesn’t seem to feel comfortable empathizing…seems almost scared to…feel.
Constantly puts themselves down..
Scared to try new things…
When you try to get the child to talk, they clam up and claim everything is fine.
Siblings also insult the scapegoat excessively
Seems more robotic..than human.
Family members that live outside of the home should not ignore signs of emotional abuse. However how you handle this, when the one abusing the child is a narcissist, is very important because if handled improperly it could lead you to be isolated from the child being abused and the family all together. And that child needs someone, someone to help, to love them unconditionally and to piece together the parts of their soul that the narcissist is shredding like worthless paper.